Bathroom Monologue: I think it shields from rain, or bird poo...

Ted was the proud inventor of the car sheathe. What a magnificent invention to father. It was durable, big enough and pliable enough to snugly fit the form of most vehicles, and despite it all, could be folded back up and stored in your trunk, taking less room than a bag of groceries. How cool was that? Something that covered your entire car and fit so easily inside it when you were done. Of course Ted was proud of fooling thousands of car-owners into believing it did something useful, and the millions of dollars it made him, but he was most proud of its space economy.