Bathroom Monologue: Small Talk, Volume 6 (Trialogues)

[Three men sit in a booth: SAMID, in a pinstripe suit; GARY, in a pinstripe suit; and SPIDER, in a spandex superhero costume]
Spider: How can you be Muslim anyway, Samid? I thought Islam hated sodomites.
Samid: I am Muslim. I am gay. I do not hate myself. So I challenge your terms, Spider.
Spider: I don’t see how it works. Doesn’t the Qu’ran forbid that kind of lifestyle?
Samid: Well, let me ask you: are you human?
Spider: Of course.
Samid: Can humans dodge bullets and hoist cars overhead?
Spider: That’s different!
Gary: Different from human.
Spider: Oh, sure. Let the normies gang up on the superman.