Bathroom Monologue: Rob Vs. Rob (no relation)

Rob Roy (no relation) had a stalker. He had never seen him, except for fleeting glimpses in the mirror, but he knew well of his existence. This stalker even had a name: Rob of Tomorrow. To Rob this man was a parasite living off the efforts of his present, spending the money he now worked for and tapping the girls he now only chatted up. This “plan for your future” business didn’t interest him. It was raw propaganda in favor of some later self that would bask in your good work. He threw obstacles in Rob of Tomorrow’s path, like racking up a credit card bill that the son of a bitch would never be able to pay off. Whether or not he did wasn’t Rob’s problem. Not presently.