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Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Bathroom Monologue: "You’re in my thoughts." –Many random friends

"I'm in your thoughts? Maybe you should have concentrated harder during the surgery. This scar is way bigger than the doctor said. By the way, did you imagine that guy clearly? Tight ass. Or I was medicated and it was actually an IV stand. I don't know, I wasn't paying attention, but apparently you were because you imagined my entire life. God, my entire life. When I rear-ended that bitch, and then she turned out to be my student loan officer? That time the circus took out a restraining order against me? How did I not see it sooner? I am in your thoughts, and you're fucking crazy. Get on some ritalin and start imagining me getting laid by a cheerleading squad already."

7 comments:

  1. I was mostly asleep until I read this. HA! You're like an alarm clock, a hot shower and a jug of coffee all tied up with a giggle!

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  2. I didn't know you liked cheerleaders! Alright, re-writing the life plan. In MY thoughts, you get hailed as the next Pratchett and King combined, make ridiculous sums of money, have books in every airport and legions of fans wearing costumes of your characters to comic-con.

    ...but y'know, I can fit a cheerleader in there somewhere. ;)

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  3. Yeah, in my thoughts your still a guy in a dry tub clacking away on a laptop, but I can add a cheerleader perched on the counter for you. winky face

    And really, the circus? Huh...

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  4. Crazy thought stream. Remind me to lock my mental windows & doors.

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  5. How many friends do you have in there? :)
    Adam B @revhappiness

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  6. HAH! Odd and lovely! You are now indeed in my thoughts!

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