Bathroom Monologue: Triple Time Travel

Time travel actually was discovered many centuries ago. In one of life's great paradoxes it was discovered simultaneously by the ancient Egyptians, ancient Mayans, and a couple of very bored 17th century British children. All three met up at precisely the same non-time, hurtling towards the revelations of the future. They arrived at the first great ripple in time, a mushroom cloud over Hiroshima, and skidded over a sea of months, crashing into a snow bank. They bickered over whether human-made global warming could have caused such a snow bank while the children perused culture. They found a present where intimate diaries were supplanted by the Facebook Wall. The dominant musicians, a Justin Bieber and one Jonas Brothers, were in a feud that consisted of accusing one another of femininity. And the president was a Nazi for wanting public health care, and some woman in a red blazer was a Nazi for shooting a moose, and some principal who disapproved of his students rutting in the bathroom was a Nazi for his haircut. They had to travel back in time a little to understand what a Nazi was. After the discovery, they took their technology further back. They've spent a paused eternity playing practical jokes on dimetrodons. This is the most you'll ever hear about it, though, since inter-chronal machines don't fossilize well and these travelers like time to themselves.