Bathroom Monologue: Rule #1 to Great Storytelling

I've never really written by rules, outside of a loose sense of grammar and syntax I picked up from audiobooks. However, I think this will be my first rule: all characters that interact must love, hate or be totally indifferent towards each other. Love comes in many shapes and packages; it can be friendly love, romantic love, lust, or whatever. Similarly, hate can be a psychotic minor nuisance, like obsessing over the obnoxious way she keeps squeaking her sneakers on the bus, or some dire, roiling rage at the six-fingered man who killed your father and who now must prepare to die. The indifference will come in one shade: total apathy. Two people who simply cannot be bothered to care are a great source for comedy. I understand we have a hundred such characters in the Senate right now. One hundred and one when the Vice President visits.