Tuesday, August 13, 2019

Gathering Rarely Asked Questions for my Birthday

It's my birthday in a month, and to celebrate I'm asking everyone to ask me something special. Ask me a Rarely Asked Question.

What are the Rarely Asked Questions? Up until August 31st, I'm asking you to comment on this blog post with something you've never asked anyone else. These are the Rarely Asked Questions, or RAQs.

Examples of RAQs include:

-What's your favorite shape of tree?
-What garbage black-and-white era movie would you remake?

-Can mice fly when we're not watching?

You can ask as many questions as you like, as long as each is unique. What you don't normally ask anyone else is entirely up to you. I'll compile every question and answer at least one per person on September 4th - my birthday.  That's how I like to celebrate.

So! What would you like to ask me?


  1. How many concerts have you seen?
    I could've gone really out there - how many containers of leftovers in your fridge - but this one I do want to know.

  2. What are two or three lines from things you've read in the last year that still stick out to you?

    The world's last breeding pair of blue-eyed ground doves is held captive by dastardly Onvenientcay Illainvay, who wishes to roast them with porcini and crushed clementines to serve his cabal of doomsday foodies. You've got to stop him! Who's on your team? Choose one historical figure, one fictional figure, and one real-life friend.

    What scent(s) remind you of childhood?

    Prematurely, happy birthday! 💖🎂🎉

  3. What leftovers do you always save but rarely eat?

    How do you think werewolf dynamics would work on a planet with 3 moons?

    Which comic book villain would you most like to star in a buddy road trip movie with? Who gets to pick the music? Who's in charge of snacks?

    Do you have a favorite memory from before age 5?

  4. What is your personal favorite pun? >=)

  5. If you could live the life of a criminal, any criminal, through perfectly harmless enhanced virtual reality, which criminal would you choose, and why?

  6. Who edited and agented the book of love and what was the advance?

  7. What question should never, ever be asked?

  8. If you could add a letter to the English Alphabet, what would it sound like and what letters would it be between?

  9. Here's my question:
    So many people say "it's not rocket science" but do YOU think it IS rocket science? or not? and why not? or why......

  10. If you were designing a theme park ride based on one or more horror movies, what would it be?

  11. Okay I want to talk about kaiju some more, John. What animal has not had a major kaiju based on it that should? And what city should it stomp around destroying?

    This is probably a thing you get asked frequently. But NOT FREQUENTLY ENOUGH.

  12. How many lawn ornaments is too many? And in the same vein: If you could replace every plastic flamingo in the world with Something Else, what would you pick?

    What is the sweetest air you have ever breathed?

  13. Pre-emptive Happy Birthday, John! I do have a question or two...

    Imagine NASA held a lottery to name a planet whose orbit was so huge it was only just discovered, and you won! What do you name this planet (and is your name a reference to something real or fictional)?

    Imagine you were offered the chance to completely map your consciousness and personality and memories and upload them onto a server so you could experience an online "afterlife." Under what conditions and circumstances do you agree to do this, AND under what conditions and circumstances would you absolutely refuse?

    Imagine somebody wanted to write an inspirational memoir about how talking to you changed their perspective on life (and death) for the better, like TUESDAYS WITH MORRIE. What would you want the title to be?

    I'm glad I've had the pleasure of meeting you in person and have many more oddly charming (or charmingly odd) stories and essays to look forward to! ~Shell S.


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