Thursday, September 4, 2008

Have you seen my R.A.Q.? 2008 Edition

My birthday tradition begins...

B. Gorsky asks, “Why is the hamburger superior to all other delicious meal choices?”
-Like many of humanity’s greatest achievements this phenomena is largely the result of personal excellence and cooperation. The excellent burger need not only be an excellent burger; it can be paired with excellent fries for a most excellent combo. As one eats these items in combination one can grill another burger or heat up more fries as either item is depleted, thus making it a modular cooperation of delicious proportions. Other combinations, such as chicken breast and carrot sticks or soy and soy sticks, simply do not satisfy as well individually, and certainly not in tandem.

B. Gorsky asks, “Why _do_ sodas rule?”
-Because they are a bubbly drink that you don’t have to consult a witch to obtain. Champagne is sorcery.

B. Gorsky asks, “Do you miss your beard?”
-Every time I scratch my chin or cheek, every time I have to buy new blades for my razor, every time I cut myself because those damned things are legal, and every time I’m pretending I’m a swamp monster. Every damned day.

Shelly asks, “What is the coolest (so far) issue of Thor?”
-Michael Straczynski writes a very good Thor. However, no other issue has the balls of 4, dropping a blond Norse god among Doctors Without Borders and an ethnic cleansing conflict in Africa. That took brass ones. And Heimdall’s eyes! Oh, check it out for yourself.

Jen asks, “A date with which superhero would most likely result in an STD?”
-Captain America. He served in so many World War 2 comics that the damned conflict never ended, and as we all know World War 2 exposed our boys to an ungodly number of French prostitutes, bold feminists and bored housewives. He’s probably got a germ warfare lab for a crotch these days.

More comic book and fewer eschatological questions than I expected. See you next year!

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