Thursday, January 26, 2012

Bathroom Monologue: Best Car Ever

It’s got infinite-inch rims so perfect that if you calculate their metrics, pi comes out an even number. The black chrome exterior has a polish so fine it reflects even the lightless void, and makes distant stars weep little novas at the beauty of what they no longer are. Your spaceship may get light years to the gallon, but this puppy is the only ride in creation that gets gallons to the mile – it makes fuel from action. You bet your ass the windows are tinted, because inside is nothing. No atoms, no axes, not even time itself. Only one person can drive it. It’s been in the garage for eons, but you know whenever the plot necessitates He give it a spin, the Ex Machina will deliver.


  1. I bet it would be fun to take a ride in that baby, but the scrape you have to get into first? Not so fun.

    Last sentence… maybe "It's been [in] the garage for eons" ? I don't catch you in a typo often. *flexes*

  2. What's one of those babies cost these days?

  3. Were you listening to the Beach Boys when you wrote this?

    "It's the little deus coup, you don't know what I got..."

  4. Putting on the futuristic shades, John? It seems you're out for some galactic warp drive! They should make that a two-seater – you’ll never know when you'll need a wingman!


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