Tuesday, April 14, 2009

“Obama to ease Cuba travel restrictions” –Headline on CNN.com, OR...

“Obama to ease Cuba travel restrictions” –Headline on CNN.com

OR

“The decision, which comes just days before President Obama leaves for the Summit of the Americas…” –Same article

-Anyone named “Barack Obama” may travel to Cuba and enjoy total diplomatic immunity
-All Cuban nationals must refer to foreign presidents as “Superman,” and follow any comment, be it negative, positive or neutral, upon his person with a compliment of his most fabulous cape
-The Cuban government must provide President Obama with a most fabulous cape
-For the next two weeks you can bring as many cigars into the country as you can hold in your wheelbarrow
-Wheelbarrows will now be allowed on international flights to Cuba
-All international flights must attach a special strap to left wing upon which a man wearing a most fabulous cape may be secured such that he can pretend he is flying
-All shops in Cuba will operate as “duty free” whenever anyone named “Barack Obama” walks into one
-Anyone named “Barack Obama” may punch babies with impunity
-Does Cuba have heat vision yet?

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