Saturday, February 13, 2010
Bathroom Monologue: Mobility: Underrated
I can limp again. This is surprisingly better than it gets credit for. Most people see a hobble and think, “That poor guy.” It’s only when you mess your knee up so badly that you have to keep it curled under you like a dead fetus hanging off your hip that you appreciate the limp. Where once it hurt like blue blazes just to shift my body, now it hurts to limp. I’m mobile! Limping is mobility under repair. It deserves a better term than “shamble” or “lurch.” This is the Igor Strut. That’s what I’m doing. I’m desperately Igor Strutting my way to the bathroom at 2:00 AM. Mobility: highly underrated by the mobile.
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Mobility is a prized possesion when trying to head to the bathroom. I'm pleased to hear that you're limping!
ReplyDeleteI actually can't limp. I'm on crutches to get to the bathroom and a wheelchair for anything further than that. This was composed after my one triumphant limp to the bathroom a few weeks ago. Since then I've lost the ability. Lost the mobility, you might say. Mobility remains underrated.
ReplyDeletewhat if we all pitched in a got you a hump? a significantly misshapen one that sticks on your back with velcro. Then instead of limping, you could just drag your foot and grunt lot like lon chaney in that Quasimodo flick. with a tin cup around your neck people would undoubtedly thrust alms at you. yeah! make your injury into a commercial venture. brilliant! I'll be your agent!
ReplyDeleteI've always wanted to be an Igor!Or a Frankenstein monster. This gives me a chance for both dreams!
ReplyDeleteI quite like MJ's idea... John Wisimodo...
ReplyDeletesorry you're still limping/shambling/hobbling. Mobility IS underrated by those who have it. hang tough, friend...