Monday, December 27, 2010

Bathroom Monologue: Hottest Present of the Holiday

Under the tree in pink wrapping paper, a doll that whispers once a day to her new best friend. Tonight it’ll say “Hold the pillow over Baby Sam’s face until he stops wiggling.” Tomorrow it’ll say “Crush up Mommy’s pills and put them in Daddy’s bottled water.” Or some variation. By New Years, they will have the house to themselves.

7 comments:

  1. My little evil pony distrubuted by hells bells inc

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  2. That is SO not funny. Someone gave my kid a doll so creepy I kept in the closet...face down. It was in a cherry wood case with a glass door and was evil. I swear! creeped out face

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  3. Using the least amount of words to produce the most horror -- one of your strengths! Spooky and fantastic -- I watched Nightmare Before Christmas last night, this goes along perfectly! Great work.

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  4. Excellent story! Nothing like a creepy doll with murderous intentions to ruin the holiday spirit. They need to look on the back to toggle the switch from Evil to Good.

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  5. December 27th. Barbie is found naked with her head twisted around backwards. Little Miss Whispers is suspected there too.

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  6. Your diversity freaks me the hell out John. ;)

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