Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Bathroom Monologue: I Won’t Fight for Women’s Rights

"Please don’t try to enlist me to fight for libraries, fair taxation or women’s rights. I am a bad fighter. You are just trying to enlist someone who will go down in one punch for your cause. If you can, please enlist me to sit for racial harmony. To mop the kitchen for cancer awareness. To collect canned goods for the cure. Which is inefficient, since you’d think you’d ask me to collect canned goods for a relief drive. But these things I am highly skilled at. If you want me to fight against domestic violence, domestic violence is going to beat me. That… sounds so bad. But it’s not my fault! I’m not a fighter. I’m an asthmatic."


  1. Would you consider placing a pink ribbon on your inhaler?

  2. That's the spirit I can get behind.

  3. It's probably really bad to admit that I found the line "domestic violence is going to beat me" giggleworthy. But I kind of did.

    Is there a ribbon for asthma awareness? There totally should be.


  4. How about taking a rest for asthma awareness? I could get behind that. I don't have asthma, I just like to rest.

  5. I'm with Spot, I laughted at the DV line. And I'll take a rest with Laurita for asthma anytime. #supportiveface


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