Sunday, July 17, 2011

Bathroom Monologue: Worth 1,000 Words

“Pssh.” Lionel picked at Sal’s notebook “A picture’s worth a thousand words, and I can take three per second. How many megapixels can you write on a page?”

“Yeah, but a picture’s only worth a thousand of its own words.” Sal splayed pages for his friend. He was a cheater; he wrote in the margins, too. “My words are worth more. Look up ‘the’ in the dictionary and it’s something like, “a definite article used, especially before a noun, with a specifying or particularizing effect, as opposed to the indefinite or generalizing force of the indefinite article.” That’s, like, twenty words for just one of mine. So if I write a thousand words, it’s worth twenty thousand words. That beats the crap out of your photo.”

Lionel adjusted his lens settings. “You used ‘the’ twice. You can’t use the word to define itself.”

“That’s just how valuable my words are.”

“It’s movies that make all the money these days anyway.”

“Yeah, but you can’t make those yourself.”

“Yeah,” Lionel conceded, taking a shot of Sal’s notebook. Sal leaned over to look in the viewer, then wrote a description of it. If they kept this up, they’d have enough for their own damned movie studio.

Special thanks to for the obvious reference.


  1. For some reason, this mirror-mirror self referential thing they're doing is highly amusing. Great bit of whimsy here. I didn't count, but did you get it to exactly 1,000 words?

  2. Yeah, well my words are worth 50k, so there

  3. I loved when he took the picture of the written words. The math gets quite complicated at that point, though.

  4. Now I'm confused on the maths. If I take a photo of one word, is it worth 1 or 1000?

  5. John, what if a picture was worth a thousand letters?


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