Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Bathroom Monologue: Consensual Sexual Harassment

"Flirting. How I tire of other people's flirting.

"Definition? Flirting: consensual sexual harassment.

"Ah, now you tell me that, no, harassment can’t be consensual. Flirting is more delicate than that.

"And now I tell you that no, I’ve seen flirting aplenty and there was little delicate about it. If it was delicate, it would have shattered from the sheer barometric pressure of lust.

"Yes, I’ve seen consensual sexual harassment. She teases him, so he teases her, and now they mutually harass with decreasing subtlety until I wish I could sue. It’s the softest of softcore bondage.

"No, I haven’t committed it. I’m ugly; I can’t find anyone to consent, and I tire of restraining orders. That’s just how it looks from the cubicle next to the hottest guy in Accounting."

7 comments:

  1. Love the last 2 sentences :-)

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  2. hehe...thanks for the hump day humor. :)

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  3. I'm imagining this as one side of a phone conversation, overheard. Nice tiny flash, Mr Wiswell.

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  4. I know just how you feel. My parole officer says if I get one more restraining order -- um... never mind.

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