Sunday, September 7, 2008

Bathroom Monologue: Wizard’s Second Rule

-All your relationships will end poorly anyway, so date for looks.
-Automatic mops never work out as well as you think.
-Point wand away from face at all times.
-Angst can replace the ether and Eldritch energy as a viable source of magical energy within the clearly-marked dénouement zone.
-Though people have been learning and speaking Latin academically for centuries, only you, while waving a stick, can make it blow up the world.
-A penis does not substitute for a wand ever. Don’t even try it. The sting stays with you.
-Zee goggles. Zey do nutzing!
-If your wizarding school gets a new student with a tragic and profound destiny, transfer out. The world will be saved regardless and you’ll be safer this way.

1 comment:

  1. Dear boy, you have no idea how happy this made me, but be sure I was chuckling and muttering "Wow!" repeatedly under my breath the whole time.


Counter est. March 2, 2008