Bathroom Monologue: Your confidence in your ability to escape a full nelson over time, OR, The first-ever Bathroom Chart

Transcribed from a piece of toilet paper, this chart seeks to begin scientifically explaining the male experience through the isolatable event of a challenge to escape a full nelson. The full nelson is an amateur wrestling hold in which the aggressor wraps his arms under the arm pits of the opponent, linking his hands behind the opponent’s head. Pressure can be placed forward, making it difficult for the opponent to breathe. It is notable as one of the seven challenges a man will see on TV and immediately think he could do better than whoever is doing it, along with curling, the first event on American Gladiators and everything on CSPAN.



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