Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Bathroom Monologue: The Case of Rock V. Scissors

What if the rock isn't big enough to break the scissors? It's hard. Probably a piece of obsidian. The scissors can make a few little scratches, but they can't cut it. Then it's a stalemate. If he throws down scissors and you throw down rock, you shouldn't automatically win. The first person to say what kind of rock you threw should qualify the contest; Mr. Scissors could claim you threw down some talc with fine lines of cleavage, at which point you're doomed.


  1. So if I took this argument, *technically* my paper would cover your scissors, and if my paper were made out of uncuttable paper (which you'd have to call out) then perhaps paper would rule all. Or something like that.

    I want to play paper, rock, scissors now.

  2. "talc with fine lines of cleavage"

    So, I'm the only one that found this line a little saucy?

  3. If there is a contest, I nominate these as two of my favorite comments of 2009.


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