Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Bathroom Monologue: Lame Parrot
"She's a lame parrot, I'll give you that. Malformed, with teeth instead of a beak and feathers so small and fine they feel almost like fur. It must be hard on her, utterly flightless, unable to join any flocks or fly south or whatever it is that other parrots do at the park. All she does when I take her out is run away from dogs. Disgusting thing, she'll just as soon hunt down a mouse as eat her seed. Sometimes I wonder why I keep her, but then I hold her in my lap, look down into those slitted eyes, and just know she's the sweetest parrot in all creation. An utter idiot, though. I said 'Meow' in front of her three years ago and now it's all she'll repeat."
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Har! Good one. The former dog catcher in me (and cat abductor) loves the story. Is the parrot free-range or kept in a cage, I wonder?
ReplyDeleteIf you believe in cosmic balance, then somewhere in the world there must be a crazed old lady trying to feed milk to a parrot and wondering why it doesn't purr when she strokes it on her lap.
ReplyDeleteOh, that lady lives down the hall. Let me ring her for you, Barry.
ReplyDelete(Thanks you two!)
Quirky lil' piece, John... And for the record... I don't "get" parrots. I don't.
ReplyDeleteI had a parrot just like that! Blasted thing. Great work as always.
ReplyDeletemy roomie in college had a parrot, i hated that bird..
ReplyDelete