Bathroom Monologue: Fragrance of Success, OR, That is not how evolutionary biology works

Their evolutionary biologists suggest human digestive systems evolved to produce feces that smell repugnant so that we would shy away from them, as they contain unhealthy materials. Our evolutionary biologists are quickly processing a new GeneTech ™ pill to rewire your intestines to produce new feces in Rosewater, Fresh Pine and Sanitary Lemon scents. Each pill will run $50,000 and the treatment takes a few months, but GeneTech says it’s always cost a lot to think your shit doesn’t stink (TM).