New Story: So You Want to Kiss Your Nemesis

 I’m proud to share my first-ever story in Lightspeed Magazine: “So You Want to Kiss Your Nemesis.” 

You can read it for free right here. 

“So You Want to Kiss Your Nemesis” is a flash fiction story about an unusual kind of romantic supply store. Do you absolute detest someone who is frustratingly hot? Well, the Intimate Blade sells the weapons you need to propose to that special arch-enemy in your life. It’s an engagement ring store, but they sell swords.

It’s such a pleasure to bring this zany little gem into the world. I hope it brightens your day.

Lightspeed Magazine is an award-winning magazine that I’ve wanted to publish in for years. They’ve published works by luminaries like Ken Liu, An Owomoyela, Peter Watts, Yoon Ha Lee, Jack McDevitt, Merc Fenn Wolfmoor, and Catherynne M. Valente, among numerous others. Breaking into this magazine was a bucket list goal for me, and learning they wanted this particular story made my day.

"The Tentacle and You" at Pseudopod

Greetings friends and fellow conspirators! It's about to be a very busy series of months, with a series of story publications, convention appearances, and wild announcements. And it all starts today.

It starts with the return of one of my quirkiest stories: "The Tentacle and You." This little story is like if a TV pitchman was trying to sell you on alien parasites living in your body. It's going to be the next big thing!

"The Tentacle and You" walks the line between humor and Horror, and as such is one of my favorite stories to perform. That's why it's so great to hear this story as part of Pseudopod's podcast. Owen Duffy provides a chipper interpretation of my tentacled marketer.

You can listen to the story for free right at this link.

New Story in Fireside Magazine!

I'm kicking off June with a brand new story at Fireside Magazine.

"Gender Reveal Box, $16.95" is a Horror story told through an ad. Ad copy is a rich space to tell weird stories, since most don't read them in the first place. It'd been too long since I'd written a story in an unusual format. I missed what flash fiction can let you explore.

Here we're exploring a revolutionary new product: a box for gender reveals. It seems benign at first, but hints about what the product actually contains, and what it does to anyone who witnesses the revelation, start to clue you in that something's wrong here.

It's great to have this drop during Pride Month. It's definitely the most chaotic story about gender I've written.

You can read it for free right here.

"We Are Not Phoenixes" - New Story live at Fireside Fiction!

Hello beloved readers! I have a new story for you today, and one that is quite personal. It's called "We Are Not Phoenixes," and it's in the new issue of Fireside Magazine.

It's a very short story about what pyromancers can do to show kindness and entertain patients in hospice. Magic is often used to damage or to heal. But magic has boundaries. When we're delicate and it's limited, how can we make meaning out of our actions? Even if they're magical?

The story was directly inspired by a blog post from Elephant's Child a few years ago. She posted about a visit to a hospice where alpacas were roaming around the compound. It turned out a local farm lent them to the patients for some gentle entertainment.

As someone who is chronically ill, and someone who has lost many friends to prolonged illness, this was powerful to me. I wondered: why doesn't Fantasy ever do that?

This story is my answer to that query. It's dedicated to many wonderful people who I won't see again, and who I am very glad to have known.

You can read the story for free at this link.

2020 Awards Eligibility Post

This year is actually almost over! Sure, some part of you says it's still March, but that part is sleep deprived and needs a hug. 

And because 2020 year is almost over, awards nominations are starting to open up. That leaves us writers with the nervous task of collecting our awards-eligible material.

Below, I humbly present the stories and articles I've written this year. This has been the most fruitful year of my career, with more publications and fan outreach than ever. I'm profoundly grateful to everyone who has enjoyed my weirdo stories. "Open House on Haunted Hill," for instance, is the single most popular thing I've ever written, despite being exactly the sort of thing so many people told me I couldn't and shouldn't write. Thank you all who proved those voices wrong.

Thank you to anyone who has space on their ballots and end-of-year-lists for any of my work.

"Gender and Other Faulty Software" is live at Fireside Magazine

I'm happy to present "Gender and Other Faulty Software," a new short story live at Fireside Magazine!

It's the story of a crew that reclaims abandoned spaceships by installing a new operating system in them. But the newest spaceship finds some bugs in the OS's code - and particularly, has questions to ask about why it needs a gender. This story is already getting lovely responses around Twitter.

I have to thank Jordan Kurella and Merc Fenn Wolfmoor for beta reading this story. They did a wonderful job pointing me in the right direction to polish it.

This is my fourth story at Fireside. I'm overjoyed to keep bringing fun and unusual pieces to their pages. You can read the story for free by clicking this link.

A Kaiju Story in Nature Magazine?

Call this one a career goal! I've got a brand new story for you about giant monsters published by Nature.

The Nature Futures program, which runs Science Fiction stories in the otherwise Non-Fiction Science publication, does amazing work. This is my second story with them, and I'm tremendously proud of it. It is both a kaiju story and a rare piece of Hard SciFi from me. I researched radiation technology and animal behavior extensively for how someone might try to treat these things if they existed.

The result is "Tucking In the Nuclear Egg," a story about how to care for kaiju eggs that otherwise will irradiate your continent. You can read it for free by clicking here.

The reception has been wonderfully warm so far. Please let me know what you think!

Two Sales to Announce!

I have two good pieces of news to share this week. I've just signed a pair of contracts for two exciting projects.

First up: I've sold a new story to Nature Futures. This one is "Tucking In the Nuclear Egg," a story about giant monsters with a little more science than I usually apply. It's about the logistics of shielding and caring for a kaiju egg that's constantly putting off multiple Chernobyls worth of radiation. It's terrifying and tender - and yes, this does mean I sold a kaiju story to Nature! This feels like a life goal.

This is my second sale to Nature, following "The Tentacle and You" in 2019. There may be a little more news about that tentacle story coming soon.

up: I can announce my first essay of the year! Uncanny Magazine has accepted "The Assassination of Professor X," which is a deep dive into the history of the character, how he's been rewritten in the last two decades to be more despicable and less idealistic, and how his famous disability has been erased in parallel. Professor X is a rare character as a disabled mentor, and I don't take his destruction lightly. I've been stewing on this for years, and I look forward to sharing it with you all in the coming months.

"The Tentacle and You" is up at Nature Futures!

I'm happy to unveil my first published story of 2019: "The Tentacle and You!"

This is the story of the hottest new consumer gadget: tentacle appendages! If you enjoy my weirdo comedies, then this is exactly for you.

It's also my first time ever being published at Nature Futures, the select program to put Science Fiction into the back of every issue of Nature.

Nature's editor was also kind enough to invite me to their blog. I wrote about the inspirations behind the story for them here. They were fantastic to work with.

Tentacle and You" is free to read right here at this link.

Recommended Reading List of Short Stories 2018

This was a year that was improved so much by short fiction. Stories I could finish in the waiting room at the doctor's, or on the train ride to helping someone with their hardship. They fit into so many openings of life. And there were such strong developments in the field this year, especially the opening of Robot Dinosaurs, a magazine that brought frequently funny and uplifting stories to a field that too often neglects them.

If you want to keep up with short fiction, I strongly recommended following reviewers you trust, starting with A.C. Wise and Charles Payseur. I fell behind in reviewing short fiction this year, but never stopped reading.

So whether you're reading stories for awards, or reading to feel less alone in the universe, here are some things you shouldn't miss. These are more stories than can fit on any one ballot, but that's the fault of awards, not storytellers.

My 2018 Publications

It's been a busy year! Most of my writing time this year has gone into the hardest novel I've ever written, which was a heck of a climb, and left me a better writer than I've ever been before. 2018 is my first year having something published my Uncanny Magazine, the first year I had a story get featured on Boing Boing, and the first year an editor accepted my story *in person*. It makes me feel fortunate both to have such supportive markets, and to be working in a time when so many other inspiring writers are putting out work.

I have three stories eligible for awards in 2018, as well as two non-fiction pieces I'm particularly proud of.

Fiction

Tank!

(~900 words)

Diabolical Plots, June 1st

Free to read at this link.

A sapient tank tries to make friends at their first Sci Fi convention.

Buyers' Remorse and Seven Slain Cause 'Adorable' Robot Dinosaur Stock to Plummet Tuesday

(932 words)

Robot Dinosaurs, May 25th

Free to read at this link.

A small town newspaper chronicles how the perfect holiday gift backfired at a local retailer.

 

Fascism and Facsimiles

(~900 words)

Fireside Magazine, June

Free to read at this link.

Two henchpeople learn the hero they've always fought is colluding

with their employer, and they have a crisis of faith in evil.

Non-Fiction

The Stories Our Games Tell Us: Excellent Game Narratives of 2017

Uncanny Magazine, January

Free to read at this link.

On the wildly diverse kinds of stories and storytelling in modern games.
Includes Pyre, Hellblade: Senua's Sacrifice, Night in the Woods,
Divinity Original Sin 2, Hollow Knight,
What Remains of Edith Finch, and NieR: Automata.

The Expendable Disabled Heroes of Marvel's Infinity War

Disabled People Destroy Science Fiction, September

Free to read at this link.

On the MCU's historic failure of writing people with disabilities
and how it culminated in exploitation throughout their most popular film.

I can't talk about upcoming 2019 publications yet, but have some announcements coming. Thanks to everyone for your support!

New Story: "Fascism and Facsimiles" live at Fireside Magazine

I have one more story for you this summer! It's been a busy few months and I've capped them off with a new story at Fireside Magazine.

"Fascism and Facsimiles" is a superhero story about henchpeople. The world is about to learn that Captain Democracy isn't a great hero, but a sleeper agent for the evil organization Kommand. It might possibly be a parody of something, not that our heroes are aware. Two underlings at Kommand are startled to learn the guy who's been kicking their heads in for years is actually a co-worker. They're more surprised to learn just how evil their employers are. It's a story about work friendships and about the struggle to refuse to be complicit.

This is my third story at Fireside, following "Bones at the Door" and "A Silhouette Against Armageddon." I'm so happy to have another story find its home with them again.

You can read the story for free by clicking here.

New Story: "Tank!" is live at Diabolical Plots!

Are you ready for a new story? Because I've got a fresh one, just for you. "Tank!" is free to read over at Diabolical Plots.

This is the story of a sapient tank going to their first nerd convention. Comics books, anime, movies - most of us love them and want a community. The tank wants a community. More than anything, the hulking piece of military technology wants to make some friends.

The story is the result of a conversation I had with Max Gladstone at one 4th Street. I have to thank him for beta reading it, as well as my other beta readers, Paul Starr, Cass Williams, Merc Rustad, and Alison Wilgus. Their support helped me believe in a story that, so far, is touching a lot of people. Maybe more of us have been the tank than we admit.

Click here to meet the tank!

New Story Live at Robot Dinosaurs!

I'm thrilled today to announce the publication of "Buyers’ Remorse and Seven Slain Cause ‘Adorable’ Robot Dinosaur Stock to Plummet Tuesday."

It's part of a series of stories on the theme of robot dinosaurs edited by the wonderful Merc Rustad. My story follows a company that promises to turn unwanted electronics into adorable baby robo dinosaurs.

Naturally, nothing goes wrong.

You can read the story for free by clicking here.

Bathroom Monologue: The Do's and Don't's of Being a Host

NO: "I'm sorry the house is a mess."

YES: "Thank you for coming so late!"

NO: "I'm sorry I'm turning again. It's a full moon."

YES: "Thank you for gathering the rags that were once my clothes."

NO: "I'm sorry that I'm devouring you."

YES: "Thank you for being delicious."

John's Publications in 2017

This was the best year of my publishing career, and I couldn't be more grateful to all the editors who've worked me with throughout it. I've already lined up a few exciting things for next year and promise to keep working as hard as I can. Despite my syndrome and depression trying their hardest, this was the best year of my publishing career. I sold more stories to pro markets, and was solicited for non-fiction more times than any other year. One of my old stories was even adapted as an Audible short! As a kid clinging to audiobooks for dear life at thirteen, I never imagined that would happen.

So I've rounded up all my publications this year in a handy guide below. Please let me know if anything particularly touched you, and as always, thank you for reading.


Fiction

"Under the Rubble" at Pseudopod, May 26

"A Silhouette Against Armageddon" at Fireside Magazine, August 1

"You Can Adapt to Anything" at Daily Science Fiction, September 15

"The First Stop is Always the Last" at Flash Fiction Online, December 1


Non-Fiction

Indie Videogames of 2017 in Glittership, Winter 2017 Issue

Evil is Not a Disability: 10 Cloverfield Lane, Donald Trump, and Don't Breathe at Fireside Magazine, June 15

BFFs in the Apocalypse at Uncanny Magazine's Disabled People Destroy Science Fiction Kickstarter, July 29


Reprints

"The Terrible" reprint at Flash Fiction Online in April

"Foreign Tongues" on Audible.com in February

"The First Stop Is Always the Last" is live at Flash Fiction Online!

Good news! I managed to sneak one more story into 2017. This is a short story about time loops plaguing a certain city bus, its driver, and its single passenger. It's one of my favorite things I've written all year, and hopefully will bring a little light to your December.

You can read The First Stop Is Always the Last for free  by clicking right here.

I want to thank Leigh Wallace and Cassandra Williams for beta reading this, and the staff at Flash Fiction Online for their warm reception. This is actually my fifth story at FFO. I never thought I'd show up there so often!

"You Can Adapt to Anything" at Daily Science Fiction

I wrote you a new story! It's live over at Daily Science Fiction, and it's called "You Can Adapt to Anything."


It follows Juniper and Miguel, two engineering prodigies who dream of being the first people to set foot in a parallel universe. The two were so alike they were almost destined to fall for each other. When they finally open that portal, they find another Juniper and Miguel, who've been working on the same project. The Junipers accidentally switch, and are stranded in alternate realities. But this isn't a bizarre land where the dinosaurs still roam over the North lost the Civil War. Our nearest neighboring universes are nearly identical to our own, just one probability variation away. So Juniper is stranded on earth just like hers, with a life that's nearly identical, trying to get back to her Miguel, and trying to ignore the identical man working beside her.

The reactions have been amazing. Thanks to everyone who's already read and shared this story. It's something I've wanted to write since I was 15.

Thanks as well to the small army of alpha, beta, and final readers who joined me in Juniper's journey. Thank you to A.T. Greenblatt, Cassie Williams, Janice Smith, Phil Margolies, David Twiddy, Laurence Brothers, and Katherine Hajer.

And thanks to Daily Science Fiction for publishing me for the third time. I do so enjoy being in their digital pages.

You can read the entirety of "You Can Adapt to Anything" for free by clicking this link.

Two Story Sales! And more questions for my big RAQ

Happy Tuesday, Earth!

You may have noticed my birthday is coming up on September 4th. I'm celebrating with a custom called the RAQ: the Rarely Asked Questions. I'm asking you to ask me whatever you've never asked anyone else, no matter how silly, personal, or profound. Drop your unusual questions off on that post through this handy link.

But I also have two two story sales to share with you. I'm so excited for both of these to go out into the world.

The first is "The First Stop is Always The Last." This is a Groundhog's Day-like time loop story, following a bus driver who can't seem to make it to the second stop on her route. It might have to do with her single eccentric passenger. This story sold to Flash Fiction Online, and will be my fifth (?!) story in their magazine.

Many thanks to my beta readers on this one: Leigh Wallace, Ariel Harris, and Cassie Williams. It's another stretch for me, expanding what I can do with my fiction, though I don't want to spoil how just yet!

The second story is simply titled "Tank!" This one was the result of joking around with Max Gladstone at 4th Street about how tough it would be for a tank to attend a convention. So, it's literally about the exploits of a sapient tank that just wants to make some friends at Comic Con. Being about a tank, there's a surprising amount of my own lived experience at cons in this story.

Thanks to my beta readers on this one: Alison Wilgus, Paul Starr, Samari Smith, Max Gladstone, Merc Rustad, Leigh Wallace (hi again!), and Cassie Williams (hi again, Part II!). "Tank!" is expected over at Diabolical Plots in June of 2018. It's funny to already have a story set for next summer!

Two Publications!

Friends! How's your summer going? Because mine's been a heck of a ride.

In the last week I've had two very different things published in venues I adore. I'd like to share them with you before August carries us all off to parts unknown.

First up is "A Silhouette Against Armageddon," my latest flash to be published at Fireside Magazine. This is my third piece they've published, and I'm quite flattered. The story follows a man who's afraid someone is breaking into his coffin. Why he's woken up in his coffin in the first place is a matter of some consternation.

I honestly think it's one of my best pieces of fiction to date, and it would've been a highlight of the Bathroom Monologues run. As proud as I am of it, I was still surprised by how many people have been sharing it around the internet. I've never been tagged in so many personal messages on social media like this. If you've already read and shared it, thank you. You brightened a dark week for me.

You can read the story for free right here.

The second piece is an essay that was a long time coming. Uncanny Magazine is running a Kickstarter to fund Disabled People Destroy Science Fiction, a special issue written and edited entirely by disabled writers. It's picking where Lightspeed's Destroy issues left off, and it's something long overdue in the field. I'm happy to have contributed a personal essay to the drive.

My essay is "BFFs in the Apocalypse" (I still can't believe they let me use that title), about the paucity of friendships between disabled characters in fiction. Usually we're a token member of a group of otherwise non-disabled protagonists. That's one reason why The Stand is so significant to me - its friendship between Nick and Tom is precious and should be the start of much more in our literature.

You can read the essay for free right here at Uncanny's Kickstarter. If you like it and believe in the cause, please consider becoming a backer!